Darkened Clarity

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Darkened Clarity

 

Sometimes it’s in the darkness

I see most clearly.

When the streets lined

With lamp lights

Illuminate the sky,

Each light reaches further

Showing twists and turns

More clearly than by the light of day.

Light shines brighter

When piercing through

A darkened veil.

I fear the darkness

All that it can hide

But know

That one single light

Can reach me

From very far away,

When sunlight would

Blend that light making it

Impossible to see.

It’s the contrast

That makes one light

Seem more brilliant.

As in my fear

I see my strength more clearly,

Witness my capability

With greater clarity than

In times of comfort.

 

 

Never Ending Winter

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Never Ending Winter

 

Days grow

Achingly longer,

Crawling

A snails pace towards spring,

But it does nothing

To quell

The unease,

The discomfort,

The weight

That pulls me down

As the winter months

Drag endlessly on and on.

Weariness has taken up residence

Daily tasks

A chore.

Yet there’s hope

Spring will come

Warmth will return

And with the melting of the snow

So too will the funk

That has descended upon me.

The tiredness will fade into the darkness

As daylight lasts longer and longer.

Until then

I push through everyday

Weeping with joy

At every sunny moment

Laughing whenever I can.

Pulling light

Out of the winter darkness

When I am able

And sinking

Into rest when I cannot see the light.

To Nothing

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To Nothing

I’m sinking down into the darkness

Consumed by it.

Reminded of the inevitably

Of death, and how inconsequential

Everything before it can be.

I’m sinking into the darkness

Losing sight of all the light.

The stars fade

Leaving nothing,

I am nothing

As I sink into the darkness.

Nothingness stretches forward and back

No future

No history

Empty and alone

Nowhere.

One day from nothing

A star will be born

Created and lit afire

To shine

To guide

To be.

From nothing is born something

And to nothing we all return.

From the darkness

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Out of the Darkness

 

Slipping slowly under the water

Down to the deepest section of the lake

Swallowed by the chill,

Engulfed in darkness

The ripples slow and end

Leaving no trace behind of

What has sunk below to the depths.

The stinging pain subsides

Giving way to numb silence.

It is in the depths,

The dark places of the soul

Where we find hope,

It’s in those spaces where the greatest lessons

Are learned.

It’s where we come face to face

With our shadows,

The parts we’d rather hide.

We meet every dreaded piece,

See our faults and cracks.

But from that meeting

Grows an understanding,

Which eventually turns to caring and then to love.

The greatest journey is to

Learn to love oneself

To love oneself as a whole,

Demons, faults, cracks and all.

To shift our view to see that all those

Dark parts of ourselves

The selfishness, the fear

Are really perfect because they create

Places for the light to shine through,

Serve as teachers to help move us along.

In the darkness, we can learn how to love

Muddle about until we can surface again,

Breaking through with shimmering droplets

Glistening and splashing in the morning light.

 

I have found and continue to find that out of the darkness- the deepest sadness and pain comes great understanding and love. Times of fear and anguish have led me to a place of greater knowing and self love. Of course when I’m in the middle of fear and sadness I’m in no place to recognize that I’m learning and growing, but when I come out the other side it all becomes clear. Sometimes even in the dark I can see that the dark allows the light to shine even brighter, and that is a special time. What have you learned in your times of darkness?