Perfect To Remember

 

Perfect to Remember

 

I laid with eyes closed

This morning.

The sound of birds

The smell of rain

Soaking in through my still

Not quite fully awake self.

Peeking through one

Half opened eye

To see a single stream

Of sun between the clouds.

It’s a day with the

Air just so, and the sky just right

To transport me

To a world of memories.

Flashing

A disjointed movie in my mind

Of images and feelings

Of the past.

Of light and dark, dances, hugs,

Trees, cars, rides,

Life.

The perfect setting

To snuggle down and reminisce

For a just a while,

To remember the joys, the pain

How they all have passed.

The transience of life,

Incredibly obvious

As it flashes by.

 

Lately I have been having many instances where I am suddenly watching movies of my past in my mind. More so than usual I am reminded of all the things that have happened in my life. It’s almost as if my brain is going through my life events, big and small. I don’t know why, I’m just enjoying the reminiscing. It’s always interesting to me the variety of memories that surface. Some are so big and important and other are so seemingly insignificant and random and yet they are etched in my mind.

 

What memories come to you?

A reminder

 

Just A Reminder

 

Maybe a reminder

To turn off the power,

Get back to what’s important.

Spend real time with loved ones,

Get creative in the kitchen

Let go of all the deadlines

The trappings of daily life.

Disconnect for a while

Enjoy the simple pleasures

Of walking on a cool crisp day,

Laughing with people you love

As you play a silly game.

Check up on people,

Provide a helping hand.

Why is it that tragedy seems

Sometimes to be the only way to

Make us all remember

What is really important.

 

This past weekend I was down in Seaside Heights, NJ – that’s when I took this picture. It’s amazing to see the progress that is being made, the restoration that is happening. It is also devastating to see all the destruction that happened. It brought me back to October when Sandy happened. I wrote this poem shortly after we got power back.

What was your experience of Sandy?

How is it all so serious?

 

How?

 

How do you process

Something you don’t want

To be true.

How do you move through

The pain

Work with the grief

When the only tears

You manage to cry

Are silent tears

That leak without permission.

Because all you want

Is to cry with heaving

Body shaking

Heart wracking sobs,

But you know

That to let that happen

To open the box

Even a little

Would

Be terrible.

To let tears fall

Would precipitate

The crumbling and breaking

Of you,

Of life as you know it.

How do you

Keep yourself together

When you’re really falling apart.

How can things be so horrible

So utterly dramatic

While the sun shines

And breezes blow,

While my body continues to breathe

While my arms and legs

Keep moving.

How can I look in the mirror

And see nothing different

Save maybe a sadness in the eyes.

How can it be so

Serious

And yet

Not?

 

I chose this poem today because there is something hauntingly beautiful about it. I wrote it at a time when I was really struggling. When I look back on things I have written in times of sadness and pain there usually seems to be this sad beauty. Now that I am in a better place it serves as a good reminder of how far I have come. To remember the pain, the sorrow allows me to feel an even greater sense of gratitude for what I have and where I am now. It also serves as a reminder that in the moment everything seems so serious and awful but with time it looses it’s seriousness. If I could remember that in a moment of pain I might suffer a little bit less. What helps you remain grateful?